each time i feel like ranting off on my blog, i hesitated, reconsidered and then proscrastinated.

tonight i will just do it, no more putting it off. not that it holds top priority, but that i just need to let it all go.

2 days of jogging didn't really help relieve stress, probably because i was struggling half the time with a flu & on the brink of suffocation. hoho, smart move malina, wait till road race incident happens again. *shudders*

the last time that happened, i felt soo scared,the only thought that came through my head was "damn, i dont wanna be one of those runners who died while running." i kinda regretted running for road race,hoping to get a personal best, only attaining a personal experience. lol,after the classic case of being sent to the hosp for hyperventilation, i told myself never to be a dumbass to risk my health ever again. oh boy,the promise was sort of short-lived, cos i still continued to run even on days when im having a bad flu & end up gasping for breath, thinking that i can let it all out & vent it while running. haha, just to sidetrack, nada created drama & ambulance dashed through the courtyard,ok, not considering the situation,when i first saw the ambulance, i felt that we were all a part of a movie, and it was all part of a film.-_-" me & my weird thinking. anyway moral of the story: don't run when you're having flu + don't gulp gallons of redbull. (i swear the effect of it lives up to the tag line, you'll feel like flying) last time i did that, it was block test,my muscles were twitching like it was all ready to sprint 4 rounds around the hall,or felt like the gears of a car. so yea, dont be a dumbass like me and do it.

anyway, all the silly things aside, i realised i've been rather cranky of late. I get agitated so easily , my tolerance level for people is slowly diminishing,it's scary cos i see myself turning into a monster,a bitchy cranky one,for that matter. freaky shit, i guess many of those taking As or under a lot of stress must have felt like this one time or another. i'm really sorry friends, if i appeared cold or snappy without any reason, really, blame it on As, it's the stress baby!

Many many things happen the past month & has been bugging me but i dont know where to start. allright, start with the part of myhp line being cut,cos my bills were overdued, and guess wat, i found out my lil brat of a cousin used my hp to dl some retarded games & also the internet. "ohhh..that explains the high bill." -_-" i swear i could kill her at the point in time. but well, i just got to give an earful of naggings to my cousin & thats it. What form of justice is that? I had to pay for her bill, cos i was nice enough not to tell my aunt about it. haha, now i have to start digging every shilling out of my piggy bank and scrouch every corner of the house to get money.lol, all right not that bad, but still, i gotta settle it damn soon.

that aside,i was just thinking about my life & all and reflecting how effed up it can get at times. life's been trying and i'm sure a vast majority of kids nowadays havent experienced life like how my family had. ohh well, life's like that some might say, but hey, that's not the effing point,easy for you to say,wait till you experience hardship. but in a positive light, let's just say im thankful for what happened cos i learnt to grow from it & build up my character.there's more things that i'd like to rant but i just cant bring myself to mention it all here.

next issue. talk about gratitude. sometimes i wonder why some ppl have lack of it, or rather none at all. i mean, at some point in your life, you will reach a point of realisation where you feel that you owe your life to someone, in one way or another, cos they were there for you or contribute to your lifestory at one stage or other. so it puzzles me how some people just dont show or express their gratitude. a mere simple "thanks" is sufficient. Just one word that can mean a lot. but well, i guess, some people arent sensitive to such stuff or maybe they forgot. a very weak excuse, but still, an excuse,as some may say.

reminiscing
12:48 AM <3

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