Tuesday, September 27, 2005
im so freaking pissed off! argh!i juz cant stand it.y e hell am i even related to __?! __ nvr even carry out his duties as supposed to. that freakin stingy SOB. i'm soo angry & hurt. must i always have some misunderstanding with the one closest to heart? i dun demand much,they're e freaking prob. y is it when i request for sth even if politely n in a nice tone, they must react with tt long face n stupid remarks that hurts so badly? remarks or comments that juz leave scars? stop it moron, i cant stand it,im still young & schooling, y do u demand n expect soo freaking much from me? what wrong have i done?y are u juz against me? y is it when i see u on that few rare times of e wk u have juz got to find fault with me? im sick of all this bullshitting,sick of u n ur stupid immature attitude, sick of u & ur lousy way of carrying out ur responsibility. guess wat, im tired of trying to make tt effort to be closer to u. im tired of being the one to make tt effort. im sick of u both making me feel like an outcast.wtf.i look back at the face
the reflection of a girl
broken hearted,exhausted
sick of the bullshitting ard her
behind that cheerful face
is a lonely girl
hers is a world of pretension
she, hiding behind a mask
she's torn up into pieces
shattered by the treatment,
bitter moments still in mind
one that leave scars behind
she used to be so strong
able to withstand the crap,
WAS unbreakable,
NOW? -unmanageable.
put on that false smile
Put up a pretense
runnin away from reality,
pretending tt everything's alrite
barely hangin on,
hiding & keeping her emotions
locking away her secrets
in that fragile heart of hers
tries to voice her sorrow,
but wonder if any1 is listening.
who would listen to her screams?
today?tonite or even tomorrow?
the emptiness she feels
the blank feelin in her heart
is sth she's used to experiencing,
shes feeling numb
Slowly trying to accept life as it is
knows its a rough world out there
she's pulling herself up slowly
fighting the battle within herself
the sad face that looked back at me,
i gave her a smile
she returned back that smile
understanding the silence gesture
for we both knew we can fight it
and survive the torments of life.
+nanabanana+
reminiscing
8:32 PM <3
(: